Comforting those who are in pain and lashing out at everyone.

People who don’t know if you are their mother, sister, friend from elementary school, daughter or aunt.

They may slip into their native language or cry when they have a bowel movement in their briefs.

Family members who care but do not understand the disease.

Family members who are in denial about what their loved one has.

Why don’t they remember me? Why don’t they recognize my brother?

Why can’t mom feed herself?

Why are you all drugging her?

What do you mean my father called the nurse a hooker? 

He would never hit anyone with a plate! You people gave him something!

My mother can’t walk, what do you mean rehab won’t work with her anymore? You have to be touch with her!

The decline continues until the loved one cannot remember anyone or anything. Then the agitation and never-ending movement begins as the life they had lost long ago in their memories fades. 

The skin changes, darkening usually starting with the extremities. Feet, legs, arms and hands. Creeping its way inward as the skin grays and has a marbled look to it. The body may become extremely hot with a fever or cold requiring extra blankets. Oxygen may be given for comfort as well. Pray your loved one, especially if they are frail and are skin & bones, that they’ve been made a DNR (Do not resuscitate). Breaking ribs of someone and likely dying from the grocery of trying to keep them alive is good for no one.

Fading away at the sun sets on their life. I pray it is in peace and as painless as possible. For when you start your journey toward the eternal, your last memory should not be of suffering, but comfort.